Dec. 12, 2009

12 Dec

10 am

1 bowl of Honey Bunches of Oats with Almonds

12:30 pm

McDonald’s

1 McRib sandwich

1 medium fries

1 medium Diet Coke

Ah the McRib. On my first post since my return, I said I’d eventually eat one. That day of reckoning has arrived. This is my first McRib since childhood, and I have to say, I can wait another 20 for the next one. It’s absolutely flavorless and unpleasantly squishy. Even McDonald’s thought that this sandwich was a joke and actually played up it’s mystery meat qualities. And yet, there’s some weird cult audience who willingly seek this sandwich out. I’ll grudgingly score this point to McDonald’s, who has this one effective viral marketing campaign that they can march out over and over. And we naturally seek out the McRib before it disappears byappealing to our base instinct to hoard whatever scarce resource there is, even if it’s a mystery, probably carcinogenic meat product. Touché, McDonald’s.

7 pm

1 turkey sandwich on wheat

handful of mini-pretzels

1 12 oz. bottle of Propel

8 pm

4 Oreo cookies

1 cup milk

10:30 pm

Domino’s

2 slices of Hawaiian Pizza

5 cans of Bud Light

I wasn’t really hungry. I only ate pizza because I was drinking beer and because I WON $70!!! It was from some game called LCR. I have no idea how to play, and I still don’t. It involved dices with random letters and dots that land in random corresponding sequences. I might have been tricked into messaging Beelzebub himself through these cryptic symbols. But that’s cool with me, because I’m $70 richer. Actually, $60, cuz I paid for two more games, spotted some friends $3 and paid $3 for the pizza. I only ate this pizza because I had newfound money that asked to be spent. If I win the Lotto, I’d be a terrible winner. I’d eventually end up in a ditch bound and gagged after being robbed by my former stripper ex-wife. Women would still think of me with more regards than Tiger Woods though.

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