Jan. 24, 2010

24 Jan

9:30 am

1 bowl of Honey Bunches of Oats with Almonds

12:30 pm

6 pieces of unagi roll

4 pieces of squid tempura

1 bottle of water

2 pm

1 Asian pear

1 mandarin orange

7 pm

lots of kalbi

bowl of rice

side of kimchee

1 bottle of water

This isn’t a football blog so I’m not going to write about either the Colts-Jets or Saints-Vikings game, which I spent all day watching. As much as I love football, and as archaic as I can get about the minutiae about the games, I know most of my readers don’t care. Instead, I’m going to talk about a related issue that arose right before the Saints-Vikings game: “Pants On the Ground.” Please, no more “Pants On the Ground” references. It’s only been 10 days and I can’t take any more. It was funny at first, but there are way too many variations, including Brett Favre’s. I’ll admit, I thought it was pretty funny that the ol’ gunslinger would lead his team in a “Pants On the Ground” victory chant. As John Madden would say after Favre underhands an interception to an ineligible receiver 8-yards past the line of scrimmage to kill a potential rally, “he’s having fun out there. What a guy!” But Favre and the Vikings then had to invite Gen. Larry Platt to the Saints-Vikings game to lead the entire team to a pre-game rendition of that song, although it is still more rousing than Prince’s fight song. The Vikings then had to go and stink up the Superdome with three lost fumbles and three interceptions, one inexcusably horrific, by Favre to lose to the Saints. This inevitably led to the following jokes on various message boards:

“Ball on the ground / ball on the ground / lookin’ like a fool with the ball on the ground”

Then there’s this variation:

“Favre’s on the ground/Favre’s on the ground/lookin’ like a fool/Favre’s on the ground”

In other words, we are now at an age where EVERY STUPID PUN is going to somehow tie in “Pants On the Ground.” If I accidentally drop my iphone, someone’s going to say, “phone’s on the ground.” If stocks plunges 100 points tomorrow, someone on Wall Street will exclaim, “Dow’s on the ground.” It’s a horrifying prospect. So please, I urge everyone to please refrain from any “Pants On the Ground” references. It was funny for a brief period, but that time should now pass. I once knew a guy who kept saying “I drink your milkshake” even after “There Will Be Blood” came out on DVD. Don’t be that guy. And don’t be like a certain 40-year-old Vikings quarterback who beats one issue to death, like whether to retire or not, until everyone’s sick of it and couldn’t care less. Please have more dignity than that.

Jacobsohn/Getty

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: