April 13, 2010 – Eat With Joe On Chatroulette

13 Apr

10:30 am

1 chocolate and peanut butter cupcake

1 small cup of coffee

3 pm

Round Table Pizza

4 slices of sausage pizza

1 slice of pepperoni pizza

1 glass of Diet Pepsi (with 2 refills)

Round Table is one of the worst pizzas I’ve ever ate in my life. In fact, it’d rank #2 on my personal list of worst pizzas ever (Little Caesar’s would claim the top spot). I’ve never seen a pizza crust that so defined the word “cardboard.” And the top of the pizza looks like a flood zone, with pools of grease sitting on top. There is no excuse for eating this. Actually there is, it’s called peer pressure. What I go through to find acceptance from people. I regret this meal. My ass regrets it too. Don’t be like me and eat here. You’re better off without friends.

8 pm

1 slice of mocha cake

2 glasses of water

I decided that some lucky people should get the chance to literally “eat with Joe” on Tuesday, so I ate a slice of cake while on chatroulette. Over 30 minutes, I saw 12 teenage boys, one group of yuppies snickering throuh clenched teeth, one teenage girl, one lonely housewife, a pair of boobs (!!) one ad for an adultery dating site, another ad for some Fox News business show and one dumbfuck’s racist comment about my “small Chinese dick.” I managed to get into one actual conversation with a shy 22-year-old kid from Canada who did not contribute a single interesting thing to our short conversation. He only responded to anything I said with “ha.” Needless to say, this is the last time anyone on chatroulette will get a chance to “eat with Joe.” They can all eat my cock instead. That however, does not mean that I will be posting said cock on chatroulette, no matter how much I want to disprove that racist a-hole.

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